One Year

It has been one year since coming back to the states. I miss Cameroon enormously, am frustrated with the difficulties associated with communication with my friends back in Bafut and am eager to go back to visit.

I've decided to pursue a night program at the University of Colorado here in Colorado Springs to get my masters in business administration. I'm not quite sure what it will translate into, but I'm hoping it will give me some tools to get back to Cameroon, and with experience and knowledge that might be more appropriate to its bubbling-up economy. We'll see how I'm seeing things after two semesters of accounting.

I'm still working at the television station, learning to sell television airtime and Internet ad space. I've screwed up a lot, failed more than that, and it doesn't help that we've entered utter economic turmoil. Despite all, I have the feeling that I'm getting the knack of it. It's becoming more exciting and rewarding with each trial (and error).

I've also learned a few things about perspectives since returning. Some Cameroonians I've met haven't received me as well as I'd of hoped, not understanding or trusting some of the descriptions of my many experiences. I've been accused of lying and exaggerating, and have heard the word "slander" on several occasions. I feel like I've been sort of disowned, cast-off as a foolish American who spins defamatory tales willy-nilly.

Of course, I don't believe that is entirely the case. I adore Cameroon, its people, its geography, its potential, its fantastic folklore, music and magic. I am critical of many things, but my overall remembrance of the country is positive.

I received a hard lesson in politics. I simply hadn't imagined needing prudence because of the commonalities my friends from Cameroon would share with me. Of course, they being in the US and having lived in Cameroon, would understand my perspective.

I also, fresh off the plane from possibly the most consequential two years of my life, failed to remember that I hardly compared to Cameroonian immigrant in America. Two years was not an entire childhood in Cameroon, raised through economic crashes of the coffee and cocoa sectors, followed by years of hard work in the US, paying for school with night jobs, working tirelessly to rise up the ladder with little to no help from family back home. After all of that, whats the need of reminiscing or debating with an American who farmed with your grandmother a few times?

Furthermore, what do I know? What sort of bias and misinterpretations could I be loudly talking about? I've not had any journalistic training... what am I missing in my storytelling? Perhaps something, perhaps nothing. In any respect, I'm taking a closer look at what pictures of Cameroon I have in my head, and how they might be wrong, to the extent of being hurtful. For anyone that I've significantly offended, I apologize, I never meant to.

So, I've learned to be a bit more respectful and not so hasty with my ex-patriated friends (unfortunately, too late for a few of them). I would highly recommend this tactic for any returning volunteers... things are not as uncomplicated as they seem.

Otherwise, things are going well. There's a lot to look forward to and Colorado is fun.